Through My Eyes
by SleepIsFun
Summary: No one wants to grow up. He came to her window, she took his hand, and flew into the night. It changed her forever. Read Authors Note First
1. Life

***Hello Everyone. This is my first Peter Pan fic. Tell me what you think of it. I've had the urge to write a story like this for awhile now. Reviews and comments are of course welcome***  
  
Life  
  
So everyone knows the story of Peter Pan. The boy who never grew up. Lives in Neverland, fights with Pirates, leader of the lost boys, Indians, mermaids, fairies. The works.  
  
I always liked that story. Even when I was little. I watched Peter Pan the Disney movie a thousand times. Same with Hook. When I was older I read the book, which I always liked too. Ever wonder what happened to the boy who never grew up? What he would be like now? I know I did. It was shortly after I read the book that I found out.  
  
I was sixteen, a sophomore in high school, my entire life ahead of me. But I didn't want it. Not one bit of it. If I could I would have sold my future for five dollars, taken the money, bought a pack of cigarettes, smoked them, and waited for death to claim me as his.  
  
Now this doesn't mean I wanted to kill myself or anything like that. I wasn't depressed, angry, sad. Not any more then the average teenager. I had the same problem our friend Peter did. I didn't want to grow up.  
  
Think about it. I didn't want to go to college, get a job, marry someone I didn't really love anyway, have kids, get old and die. Boring. Everyone does it. I would probably grow up into one of those women who don't know how to act their age. And I didn't want to go out like that. I didn't want to die trying to be something I wasn't. (Young.) I wanted to die being something I actually was. Kind of quitting while you're ahead.  
  
I figured if I had to die anyway I might as well die young, before I had to deal with all the shitty responsibilities adults deal with.. But like I said. It's not like I wanted to kill myself because my life sucked. There wasn't anything particularly wrong with my life, but we'll discuss that in a little while.  
  
The way I figured it was that a full life should be considered 20 years instead of 75. If you lived to be 23 you were ancient. It's kind of complicated I guess. All I know is that I dreaded the idea of growing up. I suppose a lot of people do and I was definitely one of them.  
  
So what does all of this have to do with Peter Pan? Everything. I could sympathize with his feelings, and I don't know how many nights I laid in bed, wishing that Peter was a real boy, who would come to my window and take me away to Neverland.  
  
A stupid fantasy is what I always thought. I would tell myself to shut the fuck up, and get to bed. You had school tomorrow. Tests to take, people to talk to, the same old bullshit.  
  
That's another thing. Besides not wanting to grow up, I was getting bored with my life. Same shit, different day. Go to school, come home, homework, TV, phone, sleep. Do the same thing the next day. Like I said before, my life didn't suck, it was just mundane.  
  
I had a decent amount of friends, a pretty good family, I wasn't poor, or abused. I always had clothes on my back, food on my plate, and a roof over my head. But I was getting bored of it.  
  
So anyway back to Peter. I was sixteen, the night I found out Peter was a real boy. This is my story of a journey to a land where everything is different, and each day is an adventure. But most importantly, a journey to a land where you never grow up and you never die. You remain just as you are, for as long as you want. Frozen forever in space and time. And it was wonderful. 


	2. A Day Like Any Other

A Day Like Any Other  
  
The day started like any other. (Although it's not really important how the day started, it's more important how the night began, I figured I would tell you anyway.) Got up, brushed my teeth, got dressed, and went to school. I took a test in math and had a pop quiz in English. After school I walked home with my friends, and they came over for a little while. We talked about the same shit we've been talking about for the past year. And suddenly it was like I was outside watching myself. I thought Jesus, is this what the next two years are gonna be like. Your only young once and it sucks that I have to waste it here.  
But just as quickly as the feeling came, it went away, and I was back to talking about Jeff, the hot guy in my Spanish class.  
Everyone left, and I went upstairs to do my homework, but I couldn't concentrate, so instead I went back downstairs. My mom and dad were both home, sitting on the couch. When they said Hello and asked me how my day was I merely mumbled inaudibly in reply.  
Now, if I knew this would be the last time I would see them for quite some time, I may have said something a little more profound. Maybe gave them a hug and told them I loved them or something. But I had no idea what fate had in store for me, so I didn't.  
I went into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator, not expecting to find anything, just doing it out of habit mostly. So after I found nothing of interest downstairs, I went back into my room and laid on my bed, to stare at the ceiling.  
I fell asleep without knowing it, and next thing I know, my mom is calling me down for dinner. I wasn't hungry so I told her I had a headache and I was going to sleep.  
I lit a cigarette, smoked half of it, rolled over and went back to sleep with out turning off the light.  
My mother most have come in to check on me some point before she went to sleep, because the light was off, and I remember feeling a hand on my forehead. I guess she was checking to see if I had a fever. When she was satisfied I didn't, she left the room. It was the last time we would be in the same room, for a long time.  
  
***Hey Everyone. How do you guys like the story? It's a little slow moving, but it'll get better. I'll update soon. Reviews are of course welcome. Also, thanks to everyone else who reviewed. It's kind of cool knowing that people actually read the stuff you write. Thanks Again, and I hope everyone keeps reading the story*** 


	3. And So It Begins

And So It Begins  
  
As I laid sleeping in my bed, I thought it was mother in my room. Walking around, maybe picking some clothes off the floor, even though I told her countless times not to. If I had been coherent I would have realized that my mother wouldn't have been in my room at 2 in the morning, cleaning.  
Well needless to say, it wasn't my mother in my room. I'll give everyone three guesses as to who it was. Give up.....? Well quite obviously it was our dearest Peter.  
Let's take a second to analyze this situation. A girl is sleeping innocently in her bed, perhaps dreaming of the very boy standing in her room. A strange boy is wandering around said girl's room. Looking at her stuff, running his fingers over the pictures, and other various artifacts in the room. He is contemplating actually touching her, but is fearful that he will bring her into the land of the living if he does. So in conclusion, what the hell would you think if a boy you didn't know was in your room, and was thinking about touching you? Flip out would be my reaction, and so it was.  
I suppose Peter didn't plan to trip over my backpack, making a loud noise. Since I wasn't a heavy sleeper, I immediately sat up and looked around. I was at a loss for words when I saw what had caused the ruckus. I wasn't sure what to say. So I said the first thing that came to mind.  
"Who in the hell are you." Not very lady like, but it got the point across. Besides, I figured that you didn't have to be polite to strange boys walking around your room at night. I suppose I should have been scared, but I honestly wasn't. I figured if some guy wanted to kill me he would. I just wished he would get it over with, so I could continue with my existence, whether it be in life or death.  
He was startled, like a kid caught with his hand in the cookie jar.  
"I'm sorry."  
"Yeah, you should be, waking me up in the middle of the night. You didn't answer my question. Who in the hell are you."  
He stood up, and introduced himself as Peter Pan.  
I thought I was losing my mind. "Peter Pan," I asked? "As in the boy who never grows up."  
"Of course. What other Peter would I be."  
"Well Peter Pan, if you don't mind I'm gonna ask you another question. Why are you in my room." At this point I thought I was losing my mind, and I figured I may as well entertain this vivid delusion that seemed to be taking place in my bed room.  
"I....I.....," he stuttered.  
"Sorry, but the Peter Pan I heard of doesn't have a stuttering problem. Try again," I said lighting a cigarette. I offered him one, and to my surprise he took it. Great I thought. I'm wasting my cigarettes on a boy who isn't even there.  
He lit the cigarette, inhaled deeply and tried to explain to me again why he was in my room.  
"I saw you sometimes. At night. Staring out the window. You look kinda sad. I wanted to keep you company, but I didn't think it would be right to just fly into your window uninvited and all. So I guess I thought that if I watched you while you sleep, it wouldn't really count since you wouldn't find out about it anyway. I fucked that up," he said.  
Serves me right for sleeping with the window open I thought. "How long have you been coming into my room," I asked?  
"A few months," he said nonchalantly, taking another drag of his cigarette.  
"Why me? I mean I'm sure there are hundreds of girl's windows you could fly into.  
"I told you," he said exasperated. "You looked sad. Like you could use a friend. Besides, you have nice eyes," he added moving closer towards me. I backed up a little.  
"How do you know I have nice eyes, if you watch me while I'm sleeping," I asked surprised that he would say that.  
"I could see them shining when you look out the window. Like you wanted something more," he told me, now sitting on my bed.  
I'm not exactly sure when I started to believe this was something real, and not just some sort of fucked up acid trip. I think it was when he reached out and touched my face gently.  
"Don't touch me," I whispered.  
"Fine," he said. "I'll go now. I recommend you lock your window from now on too," he advised as he started towards the window.  
"Wait," I said, rushing from under the covers, to the window. He turned, and gave me a look so intense, that I almost melted. "Don't go."  
"Why should I stay," he asked? "You obviously don't want me here," he said sounding quite hurt.  
"I didn't say that. I....I just don't really know how to comprehend this."  
"It's really quite simple, babe. I like watching you. You remind of something. I'm not quite sure what it is, but I know I like it."  
"Don't call me babe," I replied shortly.  
"Well I don't know your name," he revealed.  
"You've been watching me for months and you don't know my name," I said shocked.  
"Well you were never awake, so I couldn't ask you. But now that you are, what's your name," he asked?  
"Claire. My name's Claire."  
"Well, Claire, now that we know each other's names, mind if I stay and chat," he asked?  
"Sure," I said. "Why not?" I lit two cigarettes and gave one to him. I walked over to my lamp and turned it on. It was when I did this that I realized how hot the guy in my room actually was. He had flaxen blonde hair, he was wearing jeans, and an army green shirt. He had blue eyes, great check bones. Hot doesn't describe Peter. He was beautiful. He looked much older then 12.  
It was then that I also realized I was only wearing a skimpy tank top and flannel shorts. I blushed and went to my closet to grab a sweatshirt. He saw my embarrassment and laughed.  
"Why so shy all of a sudden," he asked smirking?  
"Shut up," I told him, pulling the sweatshirt down, and sitting down on the bed next to him. "Can I ask you question?"  
"Sure," he said, leaning back, contently smoking his cigarette.  
"How old are you," I asked curiously?  
"I don't know," he answered honestly. "Why?" I assumed age wasn't of much importance to a boy who never grew up and had all the time in the world.  
"I don't know. I always thought you were younger. 11 or 12. But you look older. Maybe 15 or 16," I told him.  
"Oh. Well I think I'm definitely older then 12. Technically speaking, I'm extremely old."  
"Yeah. I figured." I looked at the ceiling because I didn't have anything else to say.  
"How old are you," he asked?  
"Sixteen," I told him.  
"I suppose that's a good age to be. Too bad next year you'll have to be seventeen. Then eighteen. Until finally your just some old woman."  
"Thanks," I said sarcastically. "That's a cheerful thought."  
"Well you know it doesn't have to be that way," he said standing up and glancing at the window. I knew what this was leading to.  
"What do you mean," I asked, playing stupid.  
"You know what I mean Claire. Come away with me. Leave all this shit behind," he said, an impish glint fogging his soft crystal clear blue eyes.  
I was got up and walked to the window, staring at the night sky.  
"I know you want to. I can feel it in surging through your veins," he whispered into my ear, coming up from behind me. It made me shiver. He wrapped his arms gently around me.  
"Look," he said directing my attention to the stars. "There's Neverland. Second star to the right. You can see it if you look hard enough," he whispered into my ear. "Come with me," he repeated. "Be my friend. We can take care of each other. You'll be forever young and beautiful, having fun until the end of time and then some."  
So here it was. Do or die. Sink or Swim. What I had been waiting for. It seems like my entire life had been building up to that very moment.  
"I don't know Peter. I want to. More then anything, but....."  
"But what," he asked? "You have no excuses. There's nothing keeping you here. Come away with me," he whispered for the third time.  
I leaned against him, as he wrapped his arms around me tighter. "Please," he whispered, placing a gentle kiss on my neck. "I'll take care of you. You'll have nothing to worry about. You'll be mine forever and ever." He made it sound so good, and I knew I would go with him. I suppose I knew the moment he told me he was Peter Pan that I would go with him. I had never felt anything so just and right in my life.  
"But you can never come back," he whispered tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.  
I turned into his embrace, so I could look at him. I was searching for something in those endless blue seas, that were his eyes. I don't know what it was, but I found it. I smiled and he put his hand on my cheek. He kissed me gently on the lips. Looking back, I realize that that's the moment I fell in love with Peter Pan. "You won't regret it," he said and I believed him. I believed him with every fiber of my being.  
He pulled away and before I knew it he was flying wildly around the room in circles. "We'll have so much fun together. Just you and me. And the lost boys of course," he added.  
He landed on next to the window and looked at me. "You'll have to learn to fly," he said. "It's tricky at first, but you'll get the hang of it."  
"Are you sure I won't kill myself, or fall?"  
"No way," he said, like it was the most absurd thing ever said in the history of mankind. "I won't let you fall. And besides, you have me as a teacher." Peter was many things, and I was beginning to learn that modest, was not one of them.  
"Here," he said, taking out a pouch. "Pixie dust," he told me sprinkling the shimmery glitter over me. He put his hands firmly on my hips and leaned in and whispered "Close your eyes." I closed them. "And think happy thoughts."  
I thought of leaving this place and never coming back, flying away into infinity, and never growing old. When I opened my eyes, I looked down. I was a few feet off the air already. I clung to Peter, and he laughed at my shocked expression. "Don't worry. You won't fall. I'm gonna let you go." He slowly took his hands off me and to my surprise I didn't fall. He flew to the window, levitating outside. "Just push forward a little. It's kind of like swimming," he instructed. I did as I was told and hesitated just before I went out the window. "Give me your hand," he said extending his hand so I could take it. I placed my hand in his, and he gently pulled me out into the night air. He entwined his fingers with mine and placed a gentle kiss on my forehead. "Ready," he asked?  
"You have no idea," I told him. He laughed in response and off we flew into the night, towards Neverland. I never looked back.  
And so it began........  
  
***Alrighty, wow this chapter took a while, but I think I like it. I'm not too happy with the dialogue, but oh well. Reviews are always welcome and greatly appreciated. Hope everyone likes the story so far and keeps reading it.*** 


	4. AUTHOR'S NOTE please read

*** Alright since a lot of people seem to have a problem with my story, I took the suggestion of some one and I'm going to explain a few things. The Peter in my story isn't the "normal" Peter that seems to be in everyone else's. He's just a teenage boy, who never grew up. He does the things normal teenagers do. Smokes, swears.....etc. This is my interpretation of his character, and if you don't like it there is a solution that is blatantly obvious. Don't read it. I'm sorry that you don't like my story, but this is the way I wanted to write it. I'm sorry that a lot of you don't agree with it. I understand that people have different opinions on everything, and I accept that. Hope this clears some things up, and thanks to everyone who reads the story and actually likes it. I would also like to add that this is my first Peter Pan fic. and I'm used to writing and reading fics. that involve less innocent characters.*** 


	5. The Journey To Neverland

***Okie.....for those of you who didn't like the last chapters, don't bother reading this one, because you won't like it either. It's a song fic. chapter, set to certain parts of Californication by Red Hot Chili Peppers. I was listening to this song, and certain parts just reminded me of the story. Oh yeah. I don't own the song, or Peter Pan. So hope you like it and for those of you who don't, I'll try not to lose sleep over it. And thank you to everyone who left nice reviews. Hope you keep reading the story.***  
  
The Journey to Neverland  
  
We started our journey slowly at first, because I didn't really have the whole flying thing down yet. I could tell it was killing Peter to be going this slow, but he was being patient enough, occasionally calling me a slow poke, and to hurry up. Or that if I was moving any slower I'd be going backwards.  
I wasn't cold like I expected. Considering, I was only wearing a sweatshirt, and shorts I was surprised.  
After awhile, I started to gain speed, experimenting with different flying positions. On my back, side, stomach, under the clouds, over the clouds, through the clouds.  
Now even though flying was definitely the ultimate natural high, it was tiring as well. Peter noticed I was slacking off, and held my hand, to keep me moving. He talked a lot too, to try and keep me awake.  
He talked about pirates, and the lost boys, and I couldn't really tell you what else, because I'd be lying if I said I was listening. I was starting to get a little light headed, and my mind started to drift. I thought about all sorts of random things. Movies I'd seen, the time I lost my watch at the mall.  
I came out of my daze, and realized that the sun was setting, some where in the world. I didn't know where we were, but it was the prettiest thing I'd ever seen.  
Peter smiled at the expression I had on my face and told me we didn't have much longer to go and to just relax for a little while. He took my hand, entwining his fingers with mine, yet again, and guided me towards the sunset, towards the stars, towards Neverland.  
I took this opportunity to let my mind wander off again, and this time I thought of a song. I hummed it quietly under my breath.  
  
~~~It's the edge of the world  
  
And all of western civilization  
  
The sun may rise in the East  
  
At least it settles in the final location.  
  
Break the spell of aging.....  
  
Marry me girl  
  
Be my fairy to the world  
  
Be my very own constellation.......  
  
Space may be the final frontier  
  
Cobain can you hear the spheres  
  
Singing songs off station to station?  
  
Born and raised by those who praise.....  
  
Everybody's been there and I don't mean on vacation.......  
  
Break the spell of aging  
  
Sicker than the rest  
  
There is no test  
  
But this is what you're craving  
  
Dream of..........~~~  
  
"Claire," I could hear some one saying my name. "Wake up. We're here. Wake up."  
  
I thought I was dreaming, but when I opened my eyes the night's events came  
  
flooding back. We were in Neverland. 


End file.
